Spinning all the dishes

Today feels like a fog.

I was called early this morning and told that my grandfather, Daddy's dad, died during the night.
I already know.

I woke around 12:15 this morning to a totally silent room, but felt like someone other than the WonderDog was there. When I was little, Grandpa would run his hand over my hair..starting at my widow's peak and all the way down (my then) long hair, about midback. I felt him do that this morning. Felt the familiar weight of his hand. Then I heard him say, what he'd always said when I'd leave his company back when he still recognized me, "I'm proud of you."

So, today, silence is bad. I've got media player running through the library I've ripped onto the computer. The lyrics are speaking to me, but not in the way the artists must've intended..

And time has been spread so thin and its just hours till the day begins. And the things that are keeping you here are not keeping me here and the things that are keeping you here will keep me away. (Dashboard Confessional, "Drowning")

Cause when I take a look around everybody seems so strong. I know they'll soon discover that I don't belong. (Casting Crowns, "Stained Glass Masquerade")
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2 Response to "Spinning all the dishes"

  1. Aunt B says:
    Feb 29, 2008, 4:42:00 PM

    Aw, Jayne, I'm so sorry for your loss.

  2. Anonymous Says:
    Mar 24, 2008, 9:32:00 AM

    My condolences. You and your folks have already been through a tricky year. This can't help matters.

    The old man was a pain sometimes, but he was a breed apart and east Texas will be somehow less fun without him in it.

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