Three Things

Pardon me, I'm stealing again. Got this one from here. Enjoy.

Three screen names that you have had: Jay, Jayfer, Jeffner

Three things you like about your self: My legs, the innocent nature I portray, my sarcasm

Three things you don't like about your self: I cry too easily, I can't make a decision in under 20 minutes, my toes.

Three parts of your heritage: Irish, Swiss, Polish

Three things that scare you: the dark, snakes, lightning

Three of your everyday essentials: coffee, email, Diet Coke

Three things you are wearing right now: belly ring, tunic, contacts

Three of your favorie songs: Love Song for a Savior (Jars of Clay), I've Always Loved You (Third Day), Hot for Teacher (Van Halen)

Three new things you want to try in the next 12 months: Sign language, reviewing, ??

Three things I want in a relationship: honesty, passion, Faith (as in the big one--religion)

Two truths and a lie: My left toe is bleeding, I love fuschia, I had chips and salsa for breakfast this morning.

Three things you can't do without: Music, books, coffee

Three places you want to go on vacation: Tuscany, New York, away

Three things you just can't do: Say "aluminum," stop moving, sleep through the night

Three kids names: Maguire, Haley, Meagan

Three things you want to do before you die: retire, have a flower garden, win the lottery

Three Celeb crushes: Tim McGraw, Brad Pitt (can't help it, even if it is a bit expected), Usher

Three people you want to know these things about: I don't know.
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Tribute to Alice Cooper

Today was the last day of work for the school year. I get to spend the next 11 weeks sleeping later (okay, some of those days means an extra 30 minutes). I can stay in my PJs all day, actually have a lunch hour (not merely 30 minutes), and surprise someone at work in the middle of the day. Afternoon naps, right after lunch (which is the best time for them), dawdling over coffee, and reading everything in sight. Yes, big plans for this summer.

I'm finally completely settled into my new apartment. It's wonderful to live in a place so nice after living a few steps above rat trap before--and that's only a mild exaggeration. The Wonder Dog is please with all the extra room around, and enjoys the new patio with the view of the pretty girls at the pool.

He only barks at the skinny, pretty girls. Get a, um...generously-sized girl or a guy out there and he couldn't care less. Put a woman who's missed her calling as a model and he goes crazy. Such a man. (Well, not really anymore, I guess. Got him neutered a couple of weeks ago.)

Anyway..I'm back, after dealing with a few things around here. I've bought a couple books to spur my writing. Get ready, we're going to get interactive around here.

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I'm moving in 6 days. 6 DAYS. I should be packing something. Or cleaning out my closet. What have I done so far?

1. Checked my email.

2. Washed sheets. All of them. I had no clue I had 4 complete sets of queen-size sheets. I have one bed. 2 if you count The Wonder Dog's, but I don't put sheets on his bed.

3. Watched 3 consecutive hours of TLC programming. It was all new episodes. My new favorite show on that channel is "Moving Up." Doug, from "Trading Spaces" meets 3 home owners who are "moving up" in the real estate world. Person A is buying B's home, B is buying C's home, and C is doing God knows what for living arrangements--we're not always told. Then after 3 or 4 months of upgrading/remodeling, C & B go back to visit their previous homes and comment. Sometimes they love the new look, sometimes they hate it. In tonight's episode, C consisted of 3 single men who'd shared a house, but hadn't taken the trash out in something like 2 years. The tub was so dirty it was brown all over and the kitchen counter top was decorated with mouse droppings. When they came back to visit their former home (landfill), they actually reminisced about the trash filled days. What the hell is wrong with these people?

4. Checked my email

5. Chased the dog down trying to get back a pair of panties he stole off the top of the laundry pile. Threatened to throw him in the washing machine.

6. Washed the load of socks and underwear so The Wonder Dog would quit running around the house with my panties.

7. Ate dinner.

8. Checked my email.

9. Watched "Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets." I think it would be cool to speak Parsel Tongue.

10. Mapped out how I plan to put things in my closet in the new place.

11. Whined to a friend that I'm moving and I hate moving. Really hate it, with a passion.

12. Checked email.

13. Posted a bunch of things on the local FreeCycle group in an attempt to get rid of some of this crap before I find myself moving it.

14. Watered the plants.

15. Started typing this post, so that I could say I had something very particular to do instead of finishing the laundry or cleaning.


I watched "What Not to Wear" tonight--the American version. I like the show, except for their insistence that women should wear pointy-toed shoes. I've decided something, though.

I want to go on the show, with one change--I want them to not send me out to the high-priced boutiques. Teach me how to buy the things that will look best on me from JCPenney and Palais Royal. Maybe the Dillard's sale rack. You know, the far more reasonably priced stores that sell shoes in the $30-80 range as opposed to the $300 plus range. Frankly, I'd go spend their $5000 on the show where they wanted me to, but I want more than a couple pairs of shoes and a 4 days worth of clothes to show for it. I'm not going to go shop at those stores ever again, don't tease me.

OR, rig the lottery so that I win it and can afford to run off to New York every season and replenish my wardrobe. I promise to follow the rules.

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If I could be a....(a MeMe)

Stole this from a post over at A True Jersey Girl.

What follows is a list of different occupations. You must select at least five of them. You may add more if you like to your list before you pass it on (after you select five of the items as it was passed to you). Of the five you selected, you are to finish each phrase with what you would do as a member of that profession. Then pass it on to three other bloggers.

Here's that list:

If I could be a scientist... If I could be a farmer...
If I could be a musician... If I could be a doctor...
If I could be a painter... If I could be a gardener...
If I could be a missionary... If I could be a chef...
If I could be an architect... If I could be a linguist...
If I could be a psychologist... If I could be a librarian...
If I could be an athlete... If I could be a lawyer...
If I could be an innkeeper... If I could be a professor...
If I could be a writer... If I could be a backup dancer...
If I could be a llama-rider... If I could be a bonnie pirate...
If I could be a midget stripper... If I could be a proctologist...
If I could be a TV-Chat Show host... If I could be an actor...
If I could be a judge... If I could be a Jedi...
If I could be a mob boss... If I could be a backup singer …
If I could be a CEO... If I could be a movie reviewer …
If I could be a candy striper... If I could taste test chocolate...

Now, If I could be a chef...I'd likely weigh more than I do now and be even more irate about it. But dammit, I'd eat well. I'd also need a bigger, better kitchen, for all my stuff.

If I could be a lawyer... I'd study education law and be on the side of schools when they've got ridiculous teachers trying to sue for breach of contract when the teacher provided a fabulous performance of a classicly awful teacher. And I'd tell them that.

If I could be a Jedi... I'd use my powers of persuasion to get that really hot, really wonderful guy to fall in love with me.

If I could be a movie reviewer... I'd also critique the trailers at the start--some of those are awful! No holds barred, you're movie's apparently shit if this the best you could do to advertise it.

If I could be a librarian... Okay, so I'm cheating. I am a librarian, but I'm the best damn looking one you'll ever meet.

So, now, I'll pass the torch to...Ribalding. His answers will be far more...naughty...then mine today, I'm sure.

And to Glod. The answers should be interesting.

And no one's my blog, I can break the rules if I want to.
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A Slight Oversight and Alot of Contemplation

Normally, I would never, never do what I'm about to. However, I think it'll make for some interesting comments.

**Names have been removed, just because.

The email I received:

I thought about calling you tonight, but there is an issue on my mind that I fear I cannot properly vocalize. I have now had a chance to sleep on it for 3 nights and my opinion is not wavering...

You made a tremendous impression on Sunday... attractive, intelligent, and a strong conversationalist. However, there is one deal-breaker that you announced on Sunday that I fear will always overshadow all of the positives.
I'm sure that this sounds really shallow, but I've always had a severe distaste for smoking. Generally even social smoking is an extreme turn-off in my book.

I'll admit that I should have been more aware that your response to smoking habits was "No Answer" and brought this issue to the forefront before meeting you on Sunday afternoon. I completely overlooked that selection in your profile and for that I must apologize.

So you know the philosophy... don't want anyone to change... better now than later. You are a tremendous person and I am sure that you will find someone who loves you for everything that you are. I think that it is the best that we end our dating relationship. I hope that you can see where I am coming from.

My response:

I must say I was more than a little surprised to read your email this morning. I very much enjoyed our afternoon-turned-evening Sunday and was looking forward to seeing you this evening. I feel that I should clear the air, so to speak, about this.

I have smoked on rare occasions, in the company of smokers and even more rarely when I'm stressed. I might have 6 or 8 all year. It's not something I'm terribly proud of, and I made the decision just last week to forego it entirely, for many reasons. If I never had another one, I wouldn't think twice about it. I think you've accidently overestimated my attraction (or lack thereof) to the habit.

Does it seem a little silly to you that a relationship with potential could be hamstrung when a simple question or two would have saved everyone the trouble? Part of me wonders if there's something else you're not telling me that has led you to make such an abrupt decision.

What I really wanted to say:

It matters very little to me that you're concerned with my smoking "habit." Had I not mentioned it, you wouldn't have known about it at all. What concerns me is that you were completely unable to actually speak with me about it. That, to use your words, is the deal-breaker for me.

Two things you should probably consider before dating again. First, one date does not make a relationship of any sort. Second, not being able to talk to someone about one small thing that you, rather obviously, don't have all the information on, is not a good foundation for any sort of relationship.
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