The Clock is Ticking

Okay, so, I'm working on a "real" post that I'll post sometime this weekend. Because I want to get myself all together first.

BUT, I know the last few days I've posted "pre-fab" posts. You know "insert your witty one- or two- liners here" posts. So, I thought I'd throw together a little something for you that isn't so formulated.

Ready? Here we go...

I've been reading a lot of Christian blogs this week. So, I'd suggest, if you're interested, take a look at RevGalBlogPals when you get time. Most everyone is either female clergy, or a woman in religious work in some way, or a friend/family member of one of those. I think. Anyway, I'm really enjoying it. Being from a reformed faith myself, it's nice to find religious women who are reminding us that they're still humans. Sometimes I feel like I'm expected to not just be "normal" because I'm Christian first. Does that make sense?

I actually found this weeks ago, but I think it's adorable.




Apparently, more of us need to pay attention to those bears on the Charmin commercials. They've obviously been trying to tell us we use too much. Did you know we needed to do research to believe them? Typical.

Arthur C. Clarke passed away this week. I admire him as a writer, as a discoverer, and as a supporter and proponent for science. Rendezvous with Rama and the Odyssey series (2001: A Space Odyssey, 2010:Odyssey Two, 2061:Odyssey Three, and 3001:The Final Odyssey) have always fascinated me. Really, I still have dreams with HAL playing a prominent role every so often. I love that the science is something that really could and may yet happen in my life time, and isn't completely far-fetched.

There...how's that for a nice hodge-podge?

I've been lurking for a long time at RevGalBlogPals blog (ugh, say it 10 times fast, ok?) Every week, there's a "Friday Five," a list of questions or sentence starters that to make you think. About yourself, and maybe a little deeper than that. This week, I finally decided to play along.

Remember, today is Good Friday, the Friday immediately before Easter.

1. Our prayer concerns are as varied as we are this day. For whom would you like us to pray?Well, I suppose I could just insert my laundry list of people here..but I think I need to be a little selfish and ask for prayers for me. For discernment and some healing.
2. Are there things you have done or will do today to help the young ones understand this important day in our lives? Unfortunately, no. My home church doesn't have a Good Friday service. I realize that I could've gone somewhere and joined in, but I felt like today I needed to stay home and focus on some other things. I do recognize that I could change this next year.
3. Music plays an important part in sharing the story of this day. Is there a hymn or piece of music that you have found particularly meaningful to your celebrations of Good Friday? Music is so hugely important in my life. Today, I found myself thinking of songs my grandparents loved, whether they are typical Good Friday hymns or not--"As I Survey the Wondrous Cross," "And Can it Be That I Should Gain?," "At the Cross," and (I always think of this one when I think of my grandparents) "His Eye is on the Sparrow." Not really a Good Friday hymn, but still on my mind today.
4. As you hear the passion narrative, is there a character that you particularly resonate with? Peter, pre-3rd cock crow. I'm a stubborn mule as well, but I think that Jesus used that as much as he used some more positive personality traits in Peter. I believe Peter's heart was always in the right place, whether his head joined him there immediately or not. I know that in a lot of ways, I'm a Peter.
   
5. Where have you seen the gracious God of love at work lately? Everywhere. I'm going through something of a metamorphosis right now. I feel Him moving in me. Outside of this though, I see him everywhere. With it being spring and things blooming and awakening, I see Him in each bud, and in the way my little dog delights in the newness of things. I see Him, too, holding the hearts of my family as we heal from the loss of my grandfather.

For more, visit this week's Friday Fives at RevGalBlogPals.

The first apartment I lived in seriously confused me. I'm convinced there were gremlins in it, but that wasn't what struck me within the first 10 minutes I'd had a key to the place.

There was a light switch in the living room and another in the kitchen that did nothing. Not a blessed thing. So, I did the Monica thing, only I used noise AND lights. Because I'm cool like that.( No, really, it was because I was in my first apartment and didn't have enough things of one kind or the other to put in every outlet. But, to be honest, I am cool like that.)

I lived in that apartment for 3 and a half years. Never, never, never did I figure out what those switches went to. I don't think they did anything..they were a plant. Someone had designs to drive me crazy. Seriously.

Second apartment I moved into, same complex different building, also had a tricky light switch. This one was right by the door, on the same wall as the cable outlet. Which would be, typically, where one might want to put the TV. Also, by the door might be where one would like to put a lamp. But, because of the amazing lay-out of the place, switching off that outlet meant your TV (and VCR, and DVD, and cable box) were all shut-off as well. Again, because of the layout, you couldn't put the TV anywhere else and not have it look stupid. (Because furniture placement is everything, dahlinks.)

Now, this apartment, which I've lived in for almost 3 years, this one has a switch that only works one of set of holes on an outlet. (you know, they have 2, right? The switch only works the top one.) The outlet and the switch are next to the entry..which is fortunate. Because I actually do use it for a lamp. It's also the wall my TV, etc. are on, but there's a separate outlet for those things. Very handy.

But, it still bothers me that I don't know about those other ones. Frustrates me.

For other things that we just don't get, visit this week's Sunday Scribblings.

The first apartment I lived in seriously confused me. I'm convinced there were gremlins in it, but that wasn't what struck me within the first 10 minutes I'd had a key to the place.

There was a light switch in the living room and another in the kitchen that did nothing. Not a blessed thing. So, I did the Monica thing, only I used noise AND lights. Because I'm cool like that.( No, really, it was because I was in my first apartment and didn't have enough things of one kind or the other to put in every outlet. But, to be honest, I am cool like that.)

I lived in that apartment for 3 and a half years. Never, never, never did I figure out what those switches went to. I don't think they did anything..they were a plant. Someone had designs to drive me crazy. Seriously.

Second apartment I moved into, same complex different building, also had a tricky light switch. This one was right by the door, on the same wall as the cable outlet. Which would be, typically, where one might want to put the TV. Also, by the door might be where one would like to put a lamp. But, because of the amazing lay-out of the place, switching off that outlet meant your TV (and VCR, and DVD, and cable box) were all shut-off as well. Again, because of the layout, you couldn't put the TV anywhere else and not have it look stupid. (Because furniture placement is everything, dahlinks.)

Now, this apartment, which I've lived in for almost 3 years, this one has a switch that only works one of set of holes on an outlet. (you know, they have 2, right? The switch only works the top one.) The outlet and the switch are next to the entry..which is fortunate. Because I actually do use it for a lamp. It's also the wall my TV, etc. are on, but there's a separate outlet for those things. Very handy.

But, it still bothers me that I don't know about those other ones. Frustrates me.

I've never participated in a Thursday 13, and honestly, I'm a little on edge about it. I don't like non-prompt prompts. I mean..just list 13 somethings about yourself? Ugh..and put a theme to it? PLEASE--Just give me a theme!

So..because we all know that writers steal at one time or another, I've stolen Mrs. Brownstone's @ XBox Wife's topic--things that drive me bananas.

Thirteen Things that Drive Me Crazy



1. My downstairs neighbors. Quit slamming the door, quit letting your dog poop all over the place and then don't pick it up for days.

2. Karma, and how it seems to just love screwing with me. I never really thought Karma was against me, until the downstairs neighbor joined the staff of the apartment complex. How exactly do I complain to the manager about herself?

3. Tail-gaters. My gosh people--get off my butt? I'm doing the limit +5 on the highway and, as you can clearly see, I CAN'T CHANGE LANES EITHER WITH THE 6 CARS IN THE NEXT LANE GOING THE SAME SPEED. It's just rude.

4. The pillows on my couch. Kids, I've place them on the couch a certain way for a reason. If you must move them or squash them, kindly put them back the way they were when you sat down. And by "kids," I mean everyone who sits on my couch.

5. One-uppers. I gotta agree with Mrs. Brownstone on this one. What I really can't stand is someone who tries to one-up while in the presence of another who has known them long enough to know that story is a lie.

6. People who are down on libraries. Look, I'm pretty down on what you do for a living as well, but you've never heard me say that to your face. Get it?

7. The inept. You know these people, they can't function outside of the box they've created. Well, not true...they CAN function outside of that box, but only when surgically attached to you. (There's this little voice in my head right now telling me I'm supposed to be kind to these people, they may well be the meek. (scroll down, the Beatitudes are in blue below all the 'explanation')).

8. Wal-Mart. Yes, I know it's some sort of marketing strategy to rearrange the entire store every 17 hours, but would you please leave things in the same general area?? I'm going in for a couple of things, a 10-minute trip. But then I can't find anything. Now it's a 30-minute trip. Thanks a lot. It would've been easier if you hadn't run the 2 locally owned grocery stores in town out of business when you opened your "Super" store.

9. Joel Osteen. And it unnerves me that to share this with you will create a "hit" for him in the Google search list. Ugh. I won't go into it all, but if you want to know why, just ask me. Be prepared, this borders on things greater than just annoyance.

10. Mass emails that come from everyone. AKA, known as "repeater emails." Please, check out the list of people that Bob sent this to, you'll notice that not only is your name on it, so is mine. Better yet, don't forward to me the same email I just sent you--just a guess, but I probably read it the first time.

11. Business hours. The office for my cable company is only open between 9:30 and 4:00. Only. I think they do this on purpose so as to avoid all the people who want to call and complain about the service. Hello..guys, you operate a service industry. The edge they have is that they are the only cable company in town--so, unless you go satellite, they've got your business.

12. Talking with your mouth full. Ironically, as much as I love shrimp, crabs, and fish, I don't enjoy "see food." Please, remember that we're the species that determined what "civilized" meant. Could we act like we are? I mean, we weren't raised in barns.

13. Rudeness. I really can't stand people who cannot say a simple "yes ma'am" or "no sir." Or heck, "please" and "thank you." I wish I could post a sign at work "if you can't find it in you to be polite, then we can't find it in us to help you much." But that might not be polite, huh?

And, yes, I'm guilty of some of these at times. Okay, so maybe all of them. Except for maybe the Joel Osteen and Wal-Mart ones. Though, because of the prices, I do shop in Wal-Mart when I have more time to spare than 10-minutes (God Bless the Kroger across the street. The place hasn't been rearranged since it was remodeled 15 or so years ago.) I'll admit it, though..I'm human. I'm not always polite, I'm not always civilized...but I try.


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Hm..what 10 ten things do I have to be thankful for? Well...I'm feeling like this list might be hard coming. We'll see.

1. I had a great weekend hanging out with The Man and Darling Daughter and Son. I've missed days when it's just the 4 of us.

2. I'm on Spring Break, and today, Tuesday, is only the 2nd day (not counting the weekend).

3. Phone call from the insurance company today. They're going to pay for the repairs to my car.

4. The better news about the car is that they aren't my insurance company. And the rental car (again, that they're paying for) was delivered before I walked out of the body shop.

5. Pretty toes! Got a pedicure today. Something about pretty feet and hands makes me feel prettier.

6. WonderDog and I took a nice nap this afternoon, on the couch. We then migrated to the bed for a second nap.

7. I'm going to visit my aunt and uncle Thursday. I'm actually looking forward to it. (It's the first time I'll have been to that house since my grandfather died, and the first I'll have been there in 8 and half years without my dad.)

8. WonderDog and I shared a Deluxe Breakfast from McDonald's this morning. I don't treat him or myself to that stuff very often. I had the hashbrown and the pancakes (syrup is just too messy for WonderDog) and he had the eggs and biscuit. (The picture has an english muffin, must be from up North. Us Southerners know that breakfast should have biscuits.) We shared the sausage. Mmmmm...sausuage.

9. I'm rereading Madeleine L'Engle's Many Waters. It's the continuation of the series starring the Murry family (from A Wrinkle in Time, A Swiftly Tilting Planet, and A Wind in the Door.) This is probably my favorite series of all time. Okay, well that and the Little House books and the Chronicles of Narnia.

10. The new Lifehouse CD is really good. I'm glad that impulse buy worked out.

For other thankful lists, visit Ten Things Tuesday at XBox Wife.

I can't explain it, but...this disturbs me.

I guess I'd never been aware of the existence of the stuff. Until today. Today, I saw it on the shelf at the dollar store.

This is the stuff bad dreams are made of.

I've been thinking about this a lot lately, because I've been thinking of moving. I've toyed with the idea of moving to Georgia, where my brother is. I've looked at other jobs, closer to here but still far enough away to feel like I'm starting fresh. Even applied for a couple. I've really felt like that, even with everything that here has to offer me, it doesn't really offer me anything.

Anyway, I have been wondering why I live here. I mean, here is a nice enough place, decent schools (which is nice since I work in one), my church is near, I know people. My family is here. Yes, I grew up here, so there's the sense of familiarity and feeling like I am a part of this place, to some extent.

You know, it started because I just didn't have the funds to move out on my own right after college. My hometown likes to see "its own" come back to live and work here, and makes no bones about liking to hire us. So, it seemed natural. I promised myself I'd give my hometown 5 years--this is year 8. I promised myself I'd give my library 5 years--this is year 5. Thing is, I already know I'll be back for year 6 (well, 9).

It is nice being here. It's comfortable, safe. I know who I am here, and people know me. But I do want more. I want to know I can make it away from here, find happiness that meets everything I need. But I won't leave the safe place. Even if I think happiness is "out there" somewhere.


For other random thoughts and writings, check out Sunday Scribblings.

Lately (well for a couple of months now), I've been in a state of experimentation. Every morning, I study the idea of getting out of bed. I don't go blindly into the experiment. I don't believe in running about willy nilly (as they'd say) and jumping off of cliffs without ropes on the chance that someone will catch me. No, I weigh it out, pros/cons, factor in the possible outcomes, and what I learned when I performed the experiment the day before (hence the Einstein quote above.)

See, I've been depressed. Now, that's not a diagnosis, just a knowledge that I have. And every day, simply opening my eyes is an experiment in living. I've not gotten so low as to not want to extend the experiment for a long while, but I have wondered about bothering with that day. Yesterday was like that. I got out of bed, had some coffee, walked The WonderDog, checked email and went back to bed. It was mid-afternoon before I bothered dressing and running to the store for food (yes, the grocery fairy had skipped me again. I guess I need to talk to her boss.). I had plans last night, but I begged off. I couldn't convince myself to risk leaving the house again. I really hate that.

What gets me up is knowing I have to go to work. I enjoy my work, so I often forget I'm experimenting. But then I come home, put on my pjs and go to bed. At 5 pm. The poor WonderDog hates it. I don't play, I don't love on him. He's his own island. Not good for a puppy dog. But he's been good, he tries so hard to take care of me, resigning himself to sleep all day on a pretty Saturday, rather than play in the yard.

Now, I know that some of what I've said (i.e. opening my eyes is an experiment in living) is really a commentary of the human condition and life anyway. But I also know that I've never felt like that before. I've felt listless before, but never felt like faking it was so exhausting (and, some days, so pointless). There's a part of me that wonders if I shouldn't go find some tools until I get back on my feet, and off of my face, but I can't even start entertaining that notion right now. It means leaving the house for something other than a dire necessity or work.

And you know what really hurts? The people who I think know me best have no idea. I'm not sure if that's a sign of amazing coping/acting skills or if that means they don't really know me.

For more thoughts on experimenting and experimentation, visit Sunday Scribblings this week.

Oh good..I typed that big word up there and then freaked out because I didn't know if it was a word or not. According to Dictionary.com, it is. And it, rather obviously, means just what you think it does.

On my iGoogle page, one of my widgets (or is it gadgets?) is an Einstein quote-a-day. I like him. I don't understand everything he had to say, but I do like the things that I do understand.

Like this...

Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.

You know. I get this one. The thing is, reality is relative. My reality (rather, my perception of reality) doesn't match yours. That's just a human nature.

The hardest thing to understand in the world is the income tax.

Amen to that. And it doesn't help that it seems to change every year.

There are two ways to live: you can live as if nothing is a miracle; you can live as if everything is a miracle.

And I think everything should be viewed as a miracle. I have my cynical moments (days, ok weeks), but I really do wake up every day and feel blessed that I have woken up. I'll admit I don't wake up feeling that the alarm is a miracle (even of modern technology), but I do thank God for the miracle of waking and being able to get out of bed on my own power.

Anyway..just rambly tonight.

Free associations again. The idea is you're given a word and you reply with one word. Don't forget...I can't follow directions well. *grin*

1. Chemical :: allergies (from which I'm suffering a little right now)


2. Poker :: ooo, a tie...face and "red-hot"


3. Federal :: Income tax (waiting on my refund)


4. Mattress :: not so heavenly (the hotel I stayed in had a "heavenly bed" that sucked.)


5. Who am I? :: I don't know..who are you?


6. Investigation :: Roger Clemens


7. In good hands :: D


8. 8:30 :: bedtime


9. Creditors :: damn them


10. Resource :: learning

For other free associations (which happen to be free!), check out Unconscious Mutterings.

This week, Sunday Scribblings has their 100th prompt. Happy (sorta) Blogaversary to you guys!

The idea this time is to write about the things that are like a mini-time machine for you. Music is mine. Sometimes smells and tastes, but always music. And then the music brings up the smells, tastes, touches, and the feelings in my heart.



The first time I heard this Kenny Chesney song, I knew exactly what he meant.

I never really thought about, that music is so integral to who I am. I'm not a musician, not really. I can appreciate it at the nut and bolt level. I can tell you when someone's off-key. I even direct an instrumental choir at church. But I just realized that I regularly made sound tracks for my life.

Okay, we all do that right? Make mix tapes? Or, I guess, CDs or playlists now. I've done it for years. I caught myself the other day making the list of that defined love and life with The Man. (I was only doing that because I couldn't focus on the death of my grandfather so I picked something else that made me feel warm. The Man and I aren't together anymore so our sound track is decidedly different now than it was a few months ago, but the warmth is still welcome.)

Songs can reduce me to tears, leave me uplifted. Cure every hurt, and amplify the pain.

I've been thinking a lot about my grandmother this weekend. Next week will be 4 years since she passed. Grandpa just passed this last Friday. These two songs were her two of her favorites (sung by her one of her favorite "new guys" in country music, Alan Jackson.) We sang "I'll Fly Away" at her funeral.



For other time machines, visit this week's Sunday Scribblings.